Blooper #1: I step off our car at the Ninoy Aquino International Airport and say goodbye to everyone. On the way in, the guard asks me what flight I'm on. Papa says the Emirates flight. I scream, "no! Lufthansa!" and start walking to the Lufthansa signboard. Then I stop dead, look at my ticket, turn back and smile. "Ay, oo, Emirates nga."
Blooper #2: I'm on the plane. I want to watch a dvd, or at least get my in-flight entertainment system to work. Trouble is, I can't find the lcd touch screen. It's usually nestled in the back of each seat (for the benefit of the one seated behind), but since I was in a row right beside the emergency exit, there was no passenger seat in front of me. So where could my screen be?? I look around, nonchalantly of course, until the person beside me pops his screen out from beside his seat. Oh, so there it is. Hmm, now how I do that? I start pulling at the thing, and pull and pull until it occurs to me that I might actually be damaging plane property. I stop, dejected. After which my seatmate gently leans over, pushes a button on my armrest, and out pops my screen.
Blooper#3: I walk out of my hotel in London to go to our office, which is less than five minutes away. I am damned sure I can do this, because I was just there last night. I had even walked around the block, trying to memorize the streets. So anyway, I'm outside the hotel, pondering on whether to turn right or left (people, this is the quickest indication of a person about to get into a mess). I turn right, and less than 10 steps on I immediately notice the fact the I can't recognize my surroundings. Yet I keep walking. Towards the other corner. Towards the main highway. I reach the corner and realize that I'm heading to the other side of town. But instead of turning straight back, I turn right again. I am, in effect, going around the entire block that covers not just my hotel, but another office building. I honestly can't understand why I continue walking even though I already know I'm going the wrong way. It's a lost-in-space moment, I guess. Five minutes turn into 20, and I arrive at the office with messy hair and numb feet.
Blooper# 4: I forget The List in my hotel room. The all-important list contains the names of market sector managers, technical directors and all the other people I need to talk to, the very reason I went to our London offiice. I only remember a couple of names, and they're not so important, so boohoo.
Blooper #5: Everyone knows this already. I get off the tour bus at Green Park after a morning of walking and touring. I'm quite confident that I know the area because I walked through it the previous night already (lesson: don't ever trust nighttime vision). I look for my landmark, the Ritz Hotel, because I know it's just off Piccadilly and quite near Oxford St, where I'm planning to go for some pasalubong shopping. Sure, I do find the Ritz. Unfortunately, it's the other side of the Ritz. I now wish I were playing Sims or using some 3-d animation software where I could tilt the structures and find the proper orientiation, but I can't. I'm just a small person between big buildings trying to find where the front door of the Ritz is. Pero puchangina, everthing looks THE SAME! So I walk. To wherever. And just walk. Like I said, it's alright to get lost. But why now when I've got four hours left to shop before I run to the airport? Buti na lang I walk by a flea market in front of a church (how Pinoy) and manage to buy amber trinkets that my mom wanted me to get. Then I remember I have another landmark I could use. Pret A Manger, that sandwich place I saw last night. So I walk walk walk. There it is! But then it doesn't look so familiar..Then it dawns on me. Well, more of I suddenly remember what Duncan said a few days ago, that Pret A Manger is everywhere, literally. There's probably one in every corner of London! A fucken 7-11 for sandwiches! By this time I am so depressed I just want to sit on the pavement. But I can't really do that because now I've only got three hours before ETD for Heathrow Airport. So I do what I should've done an hour ago: Ask. I run up to a guy cleaning the sidewalk and ask where Oxford St is. He points to the other direction, straight ahead. FINALLY. I walk and heave when I see "Oxford St" on a signpost. And then, the ultimate question (drumroll)...left or right?
Blooper #6: I turn left. I get the same feeling I got when I turned right from my hotel before. Because alas, the shops are on the right side. So. Feet numb. Hair in disarray. Scarf undone and trailing behind. Jacket loosened and falling off. Bag heavy and, well, HEAVY. I walk into the first store I see, Marks & Spencer -- I find it odd, by the way, that I chance upon M&S just now because in London it's also like a 7-11 for clothes. I get in, look for the underwear section, and sit on the floor for a good 10 minutes. I grab all the cutesy undies I can find for my cousin, a couple of other items for the bf, and then trudge back to my hotel. I know perfectly where it is. I swear.
More to come.
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